My 'Nursing' History

I have read this from almost every mommy blog there is in the internet. And when I say 'every' I really mean every single blog, article or post that I can read when I was pregnant. Breastfeeding is a MUST. It should be a MUST. And there was no question about it - my mindset was when my babies arrive, I shall be an advocate of breastfeeding.

Since my babies where preemies, they had to stay at the NICU first. It's a good thing that they already know how to suck and they're good at it. There was nothing triggering my mammary glands to produce, so I had difficulty with milk production during the first week. I kinda expected my milk would be overflowing. But since there's no sucking, there's nothing. And contrary to belief, the first latch didn't hurt. At least for me. I don't know, maybe because of my WANT to nurse my babies, I didn't feel anything, just that sucking feeling.

And the blogosphere proved to be true. It is a very daunting task. We can classify babies on how they nurse and apparently, my babies were 'snackers'. Meaning, they have really good suck but they fall asleep minutes after latching and then they would need to feed again. My babies? They are the difficult ones to nurse. And I tell you, I can't even eat nor go to the rest room and I was just 5 days post op that time. I was emotional because I felt like I wasn't producing enough milk. I wanted to give up. But thanks to my pediatrician, she told me that I just have to stimulate my babies like rubbing the soles of their feet, undressing them and removing their diapers.

My 'milk production' was better. It wasn't always flowing or I am not always dripping but I know it got better. And then after that the next problem was when to nurse. Having twins, I found out that it is better for us if I nurse them simultaneously. Yes, just imagine the positions that we tried! But there are really times when Arkin doesn't feel like feeding yet so again, I am tied to breastfeeding. When Raine finishes nursing, Arkin wokes up from his nap and feeds. That makes me a 'restless' mommy.

Another thing that bothered me and my husband was when we brought the babies to his parents house, and I would have to breastfeed. I cannot do it in public of course so we were forced to teach the twins to bottle feed. And because I have 2 growing babies to nurse, and I have surrendered to the idea that I am producing enough, I also decided that we need the help of formula milk for them to gain weight, my babies being preemies.


They are turning 8 months on the 22nd and I am proud to say that I am still breastfeeding. Not exclusively, but still, I try my very best to nurse my twins. Raine, in particular, won't sleep without nursing. I guess she's just making sure mommy won't leave the house for a night out or something. And I have to say, it's even easier to nurse both of them now that they are bigger. My, they smile and laugh at times just at the site of mommy's 'milkshake'. They know now how to bite with their gums, sometimes they suck at it like when you eat lollipops - it's painful, especially now that Raine's lower incisors are starting to erupt but whaddaheck? It's one way my babies and I bond, and sing and laugh together. I guess, it is who will have a problem when they start weaning.

I am and will continue to breastfeed as long as there is milk from my 'milkshake' :)

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